mahnilla20

mahnilla20

[	userinfo	\|	livejournal userinfo	]
[	archive	\|	journal archive	]

woooooo -- its been awhile

[Jan. 2nd, 2005|12:34 am]

[	mood	\|	awake	]
[	music	\|	ja rule -- mesmerixed	]

guess who go ther cell phone back -- yess greg that would be me lolol -- n yes i finally updated -- imah try to keep up with it too again -- same # as before with the phone too -- ummm -- hope everyone had a happy new yr

link

2 comments|post comment

I couldnt be happier

[Sep. 1st, 2004|01:43 am]

[	mood	\|	giddy	]
[	music	\|	my mix	]

well i moved in on suday - i love college thats all i have to say - its not even about all the parties and shit - its about the fuckin awesome people i met already

my roomates are amazing - there is 7 of us all together - and 5 of us play basketball - so its cool to know some players on the team b4 it starts

my coach come sin our dorm everyday i guess to check up n shit - n there is some girls hes recruiting and he brings them up to our room - cool stuff

yeahh i got some ass already - so0-o0o many hotties - dunno what to do with myself =)

the boy bball freshmans are right next door to us - whooaaa - can u say BEAUTIFUL cause i could DAMNNNN - they r awesome too

so far ive been just chillin around hungout with the boys =) - the hpot oens n the bball team - they r all awesome

everyone comes to our room to chill its really cool

yeahh some partys they were cool but not everthing about college

i got class at 10 tom - but im gunna watch a movie with the guys now

ttyl

<3 toni

link

post comment

This suckkkssssss :-(

[Aug. 24th, 2004|11:18 pm]

[	mood	\|	stressed	]
[	music	\|	linkin park - from the inside	]

Heh where do i begin..

i use to be the person who had no worries in the world...
i use to not care about anything that came across me...
i use to be the one who would be able to give the best advice and help people move on...
i use to be the person who never understood why people cared so much about things i didnt find important...

what the fuck happened to me?
is it just me growing up and becoming more mature?
is it me realizing how important certain things are in life?
what is it?
im lost!! soo0o comfused...

im fucking leaving for college in 5 days and i feel like complete shit....

dont get me wrong im so0 excited im going away to school and so0o happy to be away and start a new beginning in my life and meet new people and stuff...i really am... :-)

but it all started a few weeks ago...ive been feeling like something is missing and i can pin point what it is...

i go out now and people always say "whats wrong with you?" " toni your not yourself today." -- idk..when im out with my friends im happy..i dont see me not being myself...blahhh

i need mega advice..lets begin at last april 03

i met him..he was such a sweet kid that had a girlfriend that treated him like shit..i would be the one he talked to about his problems...i was with another kid that treated me like shit and i would go to him to talk about my problems...we both had trust issues but it felt like immediately we were able to talk to eachother and not worry about a thing...we eventually started to like eachother and he broke up with his girlfriend for some reasons...

we still talked as friends and shit even when we liked eachother..he always told me to give him a chance he wouldnt hurt me...( i will never forget that ) i was waiting for him for the whole summer last year but later on he said he couldnt be with me because he was scared he was gunna hurt me...did he not realize that he hurt me by not giving me a full chance?

we went on dates and hungout and stuff - and in the end he says this after i get attached??...i didnt understand him

so0 i just moved on in my life and dated other guys n shit...and he dated other girls...we stayed friends just like we always were...he would still come to me and tell me his problems...but i started to get hesitant to tell him mine...idk why but i was...

the girls he dated hated me..heh idc..and i dont even know why but that has nuttin to do with ne thing...

he still came to my basketball games even when he was dating some girls..soo we were still close friend

just recently i met this kid hes 22 and i was really attracted to him..we talked and stuff and still hangout til this day..but now we are just friends but as before we were alil more...he had a gf at this time...

when him n his girl broke up and stuff and i still talked to my 22 yr old...he started to talk to some of my friends about how im dating a 22 yr old and stuff and seemed totally not happy with that

hes jelaous and idk why...im not with him!!

i didnt care i moved on in my life and was totally happy with where i was...even when we just decided to be friends

even more recently like a few weeks ago..he asks when im leaving..and goes hey i was wondering maybe we could mess around before you leave...i was like huh?? what???!? - i didnt know how to react to that...im like after a fucking year you wanna give me a chance?!?!

he said he doesnt want me to forget about him!!

so is that the only reason you want me to get with you??

he said he isnt one to take chances but he wants to with me

then he said being just friends would be fine he just doesnt want me to forget about him

i was so0 lost...but i told him we would hangout b4 i leave

now im leaving in 5 days n we still have not hungout..im not worried about tho..

but i just dunno what to do...i think i still have feelings for him because all i want is a nice guy who will treat me right and make me laugh...thats all i ask for...and hes the onyl nice guy i have found ( i guess )

idk if i should now take another chance or not?!?...im so0o confused

it just seems like he gets jealous over stupid shit and idk why because im not with him

when you put so0o much trust in some1 and they hurt you how can you trust them again...i know people make mistakes but does any1 believe in second chances because idk if i should...i get screwed over so0o many times i just want to be happy with someone...thats all..

i know im going away to school but im not the type to just fuck random guys or get in a relationship fast...im the pickiest person you will ever meet when it comes to relationships...i just dunno what to do..

i dunno if i like him or if im just scared to be like him and not give some1 a chance...cause i use to think he was the best thing for me but now idk

i just dont understand what goes on in his head..he confuses me so much..he says one thing and then does another...how do you trust and understand some one like that??

i need help because im completely miserable

<3 toni

link

1 comment|post comment

hotness...

[Aug. 23rd, 2004|10:40 pm]

[	mood	\|	hot	]
[	music	\|	Maroon 5 - shiver	]

last night i hungout with allison odin n greg - went to a park hungout there all night...fun times

i have a bump on my head and my right ass cheek hurts - thanks greg - for showing me those wrestliing moves...

today i went to the beach with allison and kori...it was awesome...we chilled on the beach til about 5 and then walked the boardwalk, played games, and ate... i had fun but im totally exhausted

and im hot...my face is alil sunburn but it always gets like that..should be tan tomorrow...

yeahh so0o now im just gunna hangout and be lazy tonight because im to tired to do anything

<3 toni

link

1 comment|post comment

Cant waitttt

[Aug. 21st, 2004|04:06 pm]

[	mood	\|	peaceful	]
[	music	\|	Linkin Park - sessions	]

last night i hungout with odin n allison...saw alan for a lil while...went to the park got some wendys and took pictures all night..i had alot of fun..good times

slept over allisons last night..we saw bob!<3 i miss him..hes awesome..we went swimming in the early hours of the morning like around 1:30 lol...it was fun..brought back alot of memories of when we were younger..

played donkey kong til around 7:45 in the morning...im still exhausted

tonight...PARTYYYYY in garfield...my friends are throwing a part 1 going away party for me..im excited..they care =)

8 days and im outta here..i wanna hangout with soo0o many people before i leave...and still get everything i need for school...its gunna be rough..

odin taught me a beat for the drums..i have no drum skill what so ever..lol..but im practicing lol =)

<3 toni

link

post comment

9 daysss!!!

[Aug. 20th, 2004|03:14 am]

[	mood	\|	confused	]
[	music	\|	Eminem - til i collaspe	]

well..i just realized 9 days and im outta here...heh..kinda sad..but mostly excited...im gunna miss SOME friends...even the ones i just made this summer =)

had a family dinner thing today..it was alright

allison came and picked me up and we met up with some people for this girl dana's birthday..fun times...

then went back to her house andplayed some donkey kong...kick ass game =)

tomorrow we are going to go shopping for college together..should be cool

i have so0o much shit to do in so little time..ughh..not looking forward to it

boy meets world kicks ass!!!

i have mega cramps just to share with everyone..heh

<3 toni

link

post comment

We just didnt caree...

[Aug. 18th, 2004|02:26 am]

[	mood	\|	accomplished	]
[	music	\|	Taking back sunday - cut w/out the E ( cut from the team )	]

today my brother woke me up at 1:30 to ask me if i wanted to go to the shore...i decided not to..#! because it was a tennis day..n #2 i wanted to go back to sleep...i love sleep

when i finally woke up joella called me to play some basketball..me joella n curt went to tablyn and played for a good 2 hours...fun times

the 7 11 for some slerpeesss..saw matty d there..i missed him even tho we only graduated a few months ago..

went home..showerd changed..talked to pete for alil...hes sick..has high fever n stuff...i tried to cheer him up with his football garbage

then allison came n me her n odin played some tennis..fun times...it was co0l...then hungout at odins place for a bit...got some wendys...hungout in a park for hourss...talked about stuff..odin taught me my very first drum beat lololol....ive been practicing =)

then 7 11 for more foood..

then went to another park n played around on swimgs n shit by odins house..

productive night..i had fun.

<3 toni

link

1 comment|post comment

blah blah blah...

[Aug. 17th, 2004|01:35 am]

[	mood	\|	irritated	]
[	music	\|	Grease Soundtrack lol	]

heh...today..was..lets see...alright i guess...i didnt get up til 3 because i didnt go to bed til after 6...

woke up with a headache...n hungry...just put me in a cranky mood

my neck still hurts..blahh

ive been eating like a pig lately...i gotta stop...n do more crunches lol

went out wit vitt n allison...met up with some of vitts friends and bowled..heh..it was co0ol i guess...then we went to gregs house to meet up with him n odin..

brought vitt home late again...but she was with me..so0o wasnt a problem..her parents love me

merli called me tonight...hes already at iona for football...i was happy he didnt forget about me yet...he said all hes been doing is working out n practicing n shit...crazy..he says its hard but fun..so0o im kinda excited about college..well basketball ne ways..he told me to call him tomorrow night...so0 i shall do so

saturday im going to a party...cant wait..i need a good party where i can just clear my head n forget alot of shit for awhile....so0o im looking forward to that

so0o yeahh..thats it..blah

<3 toni

link

post comment

ohh boy...hotties with the bodies..

[Aug. 16th, 2004|10:44 pm]

[	mood	\|	giddy	]
[	music	\|	Girls dont like boy...girls like cars and money	]

i just got home from the shore with the family...i wasnt looking forward to it because they srpung it upon me yesterday...but it wasnt as bad as i thought...

SO0O MANY HOT GUYS!!!! i didnt know what to do with myself ( their bodies were amazing * sigh * * faint *

i didnt go on the beach because i didnt want to get dirty..and the weathe rin the beginning wasnt great...but then later on it got hot and sunny...so0o it was nice

some hotties came up to me...i was happy =)

i hurt my neck in my sleep like 2 days ago...it hurts still =( ... it like shoots down my left arm with some movements...heh...i need a massage..any one wanna help?!?

well..yeahh...im gunna shower and then john is stopping by for a few

<3 toni

link

post comment

Vitts mom is fucking awesome

[Aug. 14th, 2004|05:54 pm]

[	mood	\|	silly	]
[	music	\|	Linkin Park- Numb	]

haha...i just got off the phone with vitt..according to vitt im a slut..which im not...but whatever...and her mom goes...well yeahh...imagine toni once you go to college your actually gunna meet some hot guys instead of the shit you found here...i thought that was hysterical..

but i did say there was a select few that werent shit...

haha..shower time

<3 toni

link

1 comment|post comment

Shitty day...

[Aug. 14th, 2004|01:32 am]

[	mood	\|	hungry	]
[	music	\|	My hot mixes	]

last night hungout with odin and every1 for gregs bday...went out to et then movie..fun times

slept over allisons house got about 3 hours of sleep

woke up to go to the beach..kinda nice..got some color...not fully satisfied tho...going back next monday hopefully

got hit on by some spanish boy..woo..haha

tonight john came over..we watched old school and love n basketball dvds...fun times...he makes me smile =)

pete called me drunk off his ass...heh...made me happy tho that he called...

every1s gettin drunk...i wish i was...heh

thinking alot about the boys...i need some1who can entertain me...have to hlold a convo..i like shy guys TO A POINT!!..i dont really have a a type..just i have to be attraceted to them sexually lol...n they have to have a great personlity...

just gunna have fun until i find him lol..not in that big of a rush...college is soon

im leaving in 15 days...i say big bash!!! PARTYYYY!!!

yeah im out

<3 toni

link

post comment

A Wa a Wa a Wooo Hooo...

[Aug. 12th, 2004|02:23 am]

[	mood	\|	calm	]
[	music	\|	Usher - Confessions	]

i slept over allison's last night...she brought me home round 4 ans i had t get some college papers sent out and shit..

then i showered and allison and kori picked me up and we went to Pizza Hut for dinner...got stared at by random guys and girls * creepy *

went out with vitt not to much to do...ate lots of food..drove around...went to the mall...spent 40 bucks of 4 earrings...yeahh stupid but i wanted them badly!!...picked up allison..bc shit went down with her plans..then we drove around...ate some more..then went and hungout at vitts..fun times...

well its friday the 13th...ohh yeah..its gregs birthday!!! ( i almost forgot) JK!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY GREG!!!!!

kori gave me close up pictures of chester from linkin park that she took when she met them..hes so0o fucking hot...what i would do to that boy =) thanks kori!!! =)

me and allison were suppose to go see lost prophets on saturday but allison might not be able to drive because her mom says a hurricane is coming...whatever

sunday me allison and kori are suppose to go to the beach...the weather better be nice or im gunna be pissed...its been about a month since i was at the beach staring at all those hot boys with nice bodies!!!..heh...it better happen..

<3 toni

link

1 comment|post comment

Wooo..

[Aug. 10th, 2004|10:25 pm]

[	mood	\|	awake	]
[	music	\|	Linkin Park - Reanimation	]

Well..my day was pretty shitty...i took a nice nap so0 i wasnt as bitchy as i was...then showered and ate and then picked up vitt and went out...

We met up with lupo...i love lupo...hes awesome..even though he picks on me a lot..i know he loves me

Then we got lost and almost ended up in new york..i woulda been pissed..but we made our way back home...and i supposedly "found myself" according to vitts mom..we then got dairy queen and came back to my house

Vitt put together my computer..its awesome...im excited

Record time baby...vitt was late..so0o i had to speed home..i got her home in 7 minutes...garfield to Little Fairy...haha

<3 toni

link

2 comments|post comment

Funerals SUCK!!

[Aug. 10th, 2004|01:31 pm]

[	mood	\|	drained	]
[	music	\|	Nelly - # 1	]

Yeahh so0o today was Mr. Leddy's funeral...i cant believe hes gone..it was so0o sad...i saw his mother that he use to take care of...she was heart broken..=( i felt so0o bad...and his 2 sons that are like my age...no one should have to deal with that...its horrible...he was only 52 he still had a whole other life to live...im sure he is doing great now...i hope he knows i will never forget him..he helped me so0o much..Mr. Leddy you were fucking awesome...i love you!! :*(

But yeah on alil happier note...i picked up vitt after the funeral with salisha and we went to IHOP = AMAZING...it was good...now im here about to take a nap because i was up allllll night again..

Last night i went to joella's house for her bday...she threw alil bbq...it was fun..then me n vitt met up with some wayne peoples and played some mini golf...fun times...after mini golf we went up to the driving range...fuckin hilarious...we had no idea what we were doing...we almost literally killed eachother with the balls flying all over the place at least 50 times...people would just look and laugh...but then some hotties came next to us...i was in my glory =) so0o i had to at least try and take it alil more serious so0o i didnt make an ass outta myself...hehe...i did go0o0d

After that we got some ice cream..then just drove around and brought vitt home..

I was on the phone with allison all night talking about tons of shit...fun times...but i only got about 4 hours of sleep...a nap is def gunna be needed so0on...gunna go

<3 toni

link

post comment

I like guys in bands...

[Aug. 9th, 2004|01:21 pm]

[	mood	\|	lazy	]
[	music	\|	Lost Prophets - Last Train Home	]

Yeahh...nuttins been up lately...been hanging out with my saint marys friends alittle more...

I hungout with allison again...i slept over her house on saturday night an we hungout all day/night sunday...we hungout with odin and everyone...whoo...went to cool beans to watch al's band play...after that we went to the diner...then to wendys lol...then to some party for alittle..me and odin decided we had to party together sometime...fun times

I stayed up til about 5 running some thoughts through my head...figuring things out...

My taste in guys varies so0o much...i dont think i have a selected type i like...just i have some qualities they must have...thats cool tho..

Heh...im boy crazyy...what can i say...but if i was with someone i would be loyal..

My computer should be coming in today or tomorrow...it better...i dont want to get my hopes up tho

link

post comment

PIZZA HUT!! -- yeah im a fat ass

[Aug. 7th, 2004|02:09 pm]

[	mood	\|	stressed	]
[	music	\|	Korn - Right Now	]

Last night...i picked up vitt and we finally hungout after a good month...she was away for 3 weeks with her softball and shit..but ne ways..we went to the birthday boys house -- swills -- and hungout with him swetits merli and a becton boy...we didnt stay that long tho we were both to hungryyy...

We then picked up rich..and went to pizza hut...AMAZING...even tho i ate way to much and felt sick for most of the night it was a good time..rich stuffed about 5 pizza of pizza in his mouth in one bite...really gross but really funny

After pizza hut we topped it off with dairy queen =) BLIZZIARD!!! Yeahhh i ate alot last night...and i still feel sick today..but yeahh..after that i brought rich home and then vitt...

Heh i didnt feel like being out anymore..i was kinda blah...shit with school just seems to get worse...but i know it'll work out...my coach if anyone will help me...plus i got a phone call from my old principle Dr. Bob...telling me that Mr. Leddy ( my history teacher ) died just alil while ago...that just brought the littliest piece of joy in my body out...i loved that guy...he was great...he did everything for me..even when he was sick during the school year and misse dlike a week in the hospital i went to visit him..thats how close we were...he looked like santa :*( im gunna miss him so0o much..i saw him a few weeks ago too when i was working a basketball camp at SM..summer school was going on and he was there...heh...depressing...well..Mr Leddy..you were an amazing guy and i know every1 is gunna be missing you <33

today tho is a family bbq...im suppose to leave early and hangout with allison..so0o that should be good...

tomorrow me allison and kori are suppose to go to the shore..so0o im pumped for that...i wanna get tannnnnn

ohh yeahh in my last journal entry with that survey thingy...i never changed the sibling one that joe had..just to let every1 know i have an older brother who is 21...okay im out for now

<3 toni

link

post comment

Joe's Survey Thingy...

[Aug. 6th, 2004|06:29 pm]

[	mood	\|	bitchy	]
[	music	\|	Linkin Park - In the end	]

im bored...

1. name: toni
2. single or taken: single
3. sex: female
4. birthday: April 18
5. siblings: Younger Brother (he's 19)
6. hair color: Brown
7. eye color: Brown
8. shoe size: '1/2
9. height: 5'10"

r e l a t i o n s h i p s :

1. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: nope

f a s h i o n | s t u f f
1. where is your favorite place to shop: hot topic..pac sun...b&b
2. any tattoos or piercings:piercing..belly button...2 in each ear...n cartilage

s p e c i f i c s
1. do you do drugs? naa
2. what kind of shampoo do you use? herbal essence
3. what are you most scared of? snakes lol
5. who is the last person that called you?: john
6. where do you want to get married?: idk
7. how many buddies are online right now?: 55
8. what would you change about yourself?: nothing

f a v o r i t e s :
1. color: baby blue
2. food: Penne w/Vodka, taco bell!!
3. boys name: john..anthony
4. girls name: jessica
5. subjects in school: psychology...gym lol
6. animals: cats n dogs
7. sports: bsketball soccer track
h a v e | y o u | e v e r :
1. given anyone a bath?: umm don't think so
2. smoked?: ..na
3. bungee jumped?: NO
4. made yourself throw up?: nope
5. skinny dipped?: yea
6: ever been in love?:eh yea
7. made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: yea
8. pictured your crush naked?: hehe i guess
9. actually seen your crush naked?: well...yeah
10. cried when someone died?: yeah
11. lied: yea everyone has
12. fallen for your best friend?: na
13. been rejected?: uh huh =(
14. rejected someone?: yea
15. used someone?: naa
16. done something you regret?: I don't believe in regrets

c u r r e n t :
clothes: bball shorts n a sports bra ( just got done workin out )
smell: idk lol
favorite group/artist: i have a few
Desktop picture derek jeter-- hes a hottie
book you're reading: nuttin school didnt start yet lol
in cd player: lost prophets
in dvd player: old school

l a s t | p e r s o n :
you touched: myself haha
hugged: prolly that little group hug a few days ago
you imed: vitt
you yelled at: heh my mom

o p p o s i t e | s e x :
what attracts you : face, body, personality, teeth and eyes
last person you slow danced with: taylor at k - night
who makes you laugh the most: the Crew
who makes you smile: my friends
who do you have a crush on: no commet

d o | y o u | e v e r :
sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: heh i guess
wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: naa
wish you were younger: no
cried because someone said something to you?: a few times

N u m b e r :
of times i have had my heart broken: too many
of hearts i have broken: not sure
of continents you've been to?: 1
of tight friends: i dont trust alot of people
of cds i own: Too many to count or list
of scars on my body: many

F i n a l | Q u e s t i o n s :
1. do you like fillings these out?: YEA WHEN IM BORED
2. gold or silver: i like silver earrings but gold necklaces
3. what was the last film you saw at the movies?: the note book
7. favorite cartoon?: Disney Movie Cartoons.. lol
8. what did you have for breakfast this morning?:i woke up at 3:30
9. could you live without your computer?: UUM NO!!
10. would you color your hair? yea
11. could you ever get off the computer?: yeah
12. habla espanol? si
13. how many people are on your buddy list? 170
14. drink alcohol? yep yep

okay time to shower...

link

post comment

Do you think love can create miracles??

[Aug. 6th, 2004|12:26 am]

[	mood	\|	content	]
[	music	\|	Linkin Park - Numb	]

Tonight i went to the movies to see " The Notebook "...let me tell you about this experience...

It was kinda awkward...me..joella..mo..and elissa went to the theatre at the garden state plaza...we pull in an no one was there...the place looked abandoned..it was kinda spooky...so0o we go and buy our tickets...then we walk in...the place is empty...and we go by the food counter..no ones there...so0o we wait...looking for a bell lol..then the same guy that was in the ticket booth came out and went to sell us our food...we were like uhhh...we found it alil weird...but we just laughed it off and went to get our seats...we didnt have that much trouble since the place was huge and we were the only 4 in there...we spooked ourselves out and were about to leave because we thought we were gunna get killed until 4 other girls walked in...so0o after that we calmed down and enjoyed the movie..

It was amazing...so0o sad...i cried alil...soo did the other 5 people in the theatre lol..the place was empty but we didnt care...im not gunna give the movie away but it was a great one definately...a love story...a chick flick..yeahhh...but it was good..i liked it a lot...it made me think on how good a relationship can turn out no matter how many bad things you have to sometimes experience to get to it..even with the same love you started with...it was amazing i loved it

After the movie we drove around and danced to techno in the car...it was hilarious....haha...people in the cars next to us were just staring...it was great...

Yeah i called it an early night...even tho i had alotta fun especially with my girls...i just wanted to come home and relax and shit..i have'nt hung out with them for awhile ttho..it was alotta fun..i missed them..

<3 toni

link

post comment

Im just a Teenage Dirtbag Babyyy...

[Aug. 5th, 2004|02:25 pm]

[	mood	\|	pissed off	]
[	music	\|	Korn- Did My Time	]

So yeahh...i just woke up...my new computer was supposed to get shipped out yesterday...lets all pray i get it soon **cross ur fingers**...besides that nothing is really new at all..

Hungout with Allison again last night...i swear its been a record..i havent seen this girl so0o much in these past 4 yrs..its just i never had time do to anything...now that its summer and im outta high school and no more AAU and summer league games..i actually have time to hangout wit my friends..thats a plus i guess

We hungout in Fort Lee..it was fun...i was blahh most of the night...i think it was because i havent gotten sleep in a longgg time...yeahh ill admit it i was cranky...

24 days and im outta here...kinda looking forward to it actually...gunna miss SOME people..not to many lol...but im only 15 minutes away..i can come home whenever i want and hangout with my friends..so0 im happy about that

I havent been working out lately either..i think im just gunna lift alil today too..im so0o fucking exhausted i dunno what the hell is wrong with me...im not to worried about it tho because its going to be easier for me to work out when im at achool because i have easier access to the gym..and everything is free...i can have trainers help me with weights n shit..so0o im looking forward to it.

Me and my brother havent been getting along that much lately..he is so0o over protective i hate it...like i tell him about a guy one day and a different one the next he asks me a million questions and tells me things over and over n over again that i really already know about and dont wanna hear..like i dont do anything wrong..im fucking single..i can do whatever i want...if he gets this pissed off about it he shouldnt ask me whats goin on with my love life..lol...even tho i dont have one right now...i dont trust anyone...to easy to get hurt and i have enough shit on my mind...ill find one soon enough tho..ever since that whole thing with taylor and me he found out about...he got really pissed about that..which i dont blame him lol im his younger sister n i was really pissed to..but ever since then hes alot more protective i think...but u know what ill learn from my mistakes...i have...im still gunna do what i wanna do...but i know his only looking out for me..but it still gets me angry sometimes

my fucking rents have been on my ass too lately...well just my mom actually...my dad doesnt have a care in the world...its like a month b4 i lave for school she tries to start a whole bunch of new shit she never did b4..yeahhh okayyy...maybe...shes been gettin on my nerves to lately...

I just want every1 to leave me alone..i just want one day where i could do absolutely nothing n just sleep all day and not get outta bed and not have to deal with any1's shit..that would make me extremely happy

<3 toni

link

post comment

Blahh Blahh Blahh...

[Aug. 3rd, 2004|02:38 pm]

[	mood	\|	cranky	]
[	music	\|	311- Love Song	]

Have you ever been so0o confused about something you just wish it would leave you alone..i feel like that right now..1st of all i got absolutely no sleep last night..not even because i was online and then on the phone til 6:15 in the morning...because i care to much about the stupid shit that pisses me off and not enough on the good..thats what greg said ne ways lol..listen to this..i need advice so i would like to see some comments people...

What would you do...if the guy/girl...you have wanted for a fucking yr...finally expressed his/her feelings towards you...buttttt u have tried to get over them and move on and look for someone new...thats just the short version basically...but for the people that know the story...im pretty fucked up in the head right now...like yeah im going away to college and shit and im " gunna meet a million guys"...but i know for a fact thats not the type of guy im gunna be going after...i always thought this kid was perfect to me...nice sweet caring..but he told me he would never break my heart ( " toni i would never hurt you")...and he has plenty of times..i dont know...but i got over him and finally moved on...i had someone else in mind too...it just takes me forever to get comfortable with a guy i like and express myself too because im so0 use to getting screwed over..i have to make sure i TRUST them and they are exactly what i want..i dont know i just felt like i trusted him and now its broken alil because of what has happened..s0o0o confused...but i have to keep my options open...any nice sweet guys out there...im here waiting lol

I HATE LIARS WITH A PASSION!!!

Yeahh so0o i just woke up...kinda cranky today...dunno why...its raining...i dont even feel like going out anywhere to be honest..but who knows what ill do tonight...

<3

link

1 comment|post comment

navigation

[	viewing	\|	most recent entries	]
[	go	\|	earlier	]

Advertisement